A Shrub to an Oak

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Photo Cred: Chelsea Steller

Have you ever started a book that just seemed to take forever to get through? One that you started and stopped, picked up and put down, brought with you to read during appointments and then kept on your shelf for months? There is a particular book that I started last summer and what with the ups and downs with life, other books, activities, and holidays, I’m finally finishing Beyond Desolate by Schultz and Estabrook.

Right now, I’m inspired to write about this book because of a realization and inspiration from God that just hit home for me. Sometimes I’m amazed at God’s timing with even the smallest details- such allowing me time to finish a book today of all days, that my heart is ready to hear some truths that might not have hit me the same way when I started the book 6 months ago last summer. Details in life matter so much to God!

The author’s write about Isaiah 61:3 in the last chapter of Beyond Desolate, God taking a destroyed, torn down, scraggily plant of a life and changing it to a strong standing tree… “That they might be called trees of righteousness…” (Isaiah 61:3). The author’s write, “You are no longer a brittle bush, blown about by the winds of this world. You are a mighty oak tree… This is possible because another tree held the bloody body of the Son of God for you and me. Out of the devastating rubble and ashes, God loves to take the shattered and make us strong,” (p. 269).

My question after reading these quotes and processing the powerful imagery was, “Why? Why would you do this for us, Lord?” My life feels beat down, dried up and scraggily. So really, why would you desire to change me to a strong standing oak?

I know in my head Jesus loves me. That He died for me. That God abandoned His Son on a cross for me. But really, why? What is it about His love for us that He would go to the ultimate extreme to show us, and make us righteous? And strong? And lovely in His eyes?

So I asked Him. And waited. And within seconds a song from church floated to the front of my mind. I thought that was a distraction and tried pushing the song from mind in order to find the great Truth from God that I anticipated would take days and weeks for Him to reveal, but then across my heart I heard the word, “Listen.” So I let the words of the song speak to me, a song that I don’t even really like the tune of.

“Not to us, but to your name be the glory… It’s not for us it’s all for you.”

Have you heard the song Not To Us by Chris Tomlin? Take a listen if you haven’t.

Basically what God revealed, and what is written in the second part of the verse in Isaiah 61 is- it’s not for us but for His own glory’s sake! God is the reason that Christ died for you and me, giving us life, calling us wonderfully made, created and sustained by Him and for Him! We are trees of righteousness “that He might be glorified” (Isaiah 61:3).

Read Isaiah 61: 1-3 with me. It says:

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me, for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed. He has sent me to tell those who mourn that the time of the Lord’s favor has come, and with it, the day of God’s anger against their enemies. To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory.

I praise God that He revealed this truth to me, and so quickly! My transformation from shrub to an oak, is not for my sake alone, but it points to the greater glory of God; a tree growing and strong that when others look, they don’t see me, but God’s work in me.

It’s not up to me to make me better, more holy, strong, or capable. It’s the storms of life, being rooted in the word, and trusting the warm rays of His love to change and grow me to the woman in righteousness for His Own Glory. Taking pressure off of myself to make something amazing happen in my life and pointing back to Him. He is already amazing and is doing the work to change my life for a greater purpose- His own.

There is such powerful imagery in a tree growing by God and for God. And I encourage you to look at the storms and words that God has spoken in and over your life to grow you wonderfully and made for His glory.

 

Dear Daughter

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Photo Cred: Nick Wilkes

Dear Daughter,

Sit with me while I tell you a story. Can you do that? This story begins long before you were born. Long before your brothers and sisters, friends, and even your parents were born. It begins at the dawn of time, when I created time…

Before there was anything, I AM, and it was then that I thought of you.

I was already dreaming of creating your fingerprints, your eyelashes, your toes, your heartbeat.

You see it is in My nature to create. I can’t help Myself!

I love creating snowflakes in various crystal designs. I love creating the thin, red skin of an apple, with a sweet crunchy flesh just below. I love creating translucent water that rushes over rock formations that I molded, forming waterfalls with a soothing sound. And of course there are the animals of every kind!

I am in the thick sinew of an elephant trunk. And in the light twittering of Lovebirds as they flit about. From every ladybug spot to transparent butterfly wing… I created it all.

But guess what I love more than all of these creations and creatures combined? You.

You, my darling, I sing over. You, my princess, I call my own. You, my daughter, I gave up my Son for- nailed to a splintered cross, whipped beyond recognition, His flesh pouring out blood and water, all for you.

Your heart is worth it, and I desire your love and adoration. So though I created everything, I also gave My Everything.

Dear daughter.

Take a deep breath; know that I sustain your life with My breath.

Wiggle your fingers; see that I set aside your hands to worship Me.

I gave you a nose to smell the fragrance of spring. And lips that curl up when you laugh. And wisdom to make choices that honor Me.

Dear daughter. I love you…

Will you think of Me this Valentine’s Day? Will you think of My love for you?

Will you love Me in return?

Dear daughter, no matter what you say, know that my love will always be there for you.

Forever,

Your Abba, Your Father

 

 

*This post was originally written for Wonderfully Made.

 

6 Things I Miss About Intern Life

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Part time jobs, moving around the country, traveling, not having a job for almost a year, and various internships since graduating college have marked my climb to finally land me in the stepping stone, paid position that I recently acquired in TV Production.

For someone who craves stability and knowing what’s next, the process of finding myself in the job search was not an easy one, but it has definitely enhanced my perspective of what it means to discover a field I enjoy, struggle after college to get there with a few twists and turns, and not give up in the process! Life is an adventure with unexpected experiences after all.

I achieved my current job a few months after interning at a local production company, where I work on 3 different sports shows for Penn State University. It is a BLESSING and stepping stone. On this journey of life, I am more than happy to be working in the creative field of quick turnover and slow waiting of media production- especially as I started at this particular company just a few months ago, as an intern, 2 years out of college.

I have big dreams in media production, but the reality is I’m a growing novice. Part of that growth comes from the change in status of Intern to Production Assistant- and there are some takeaways that the various internships I’ve had in and out of college that I miss, as well as wanting to laugh at!

1. Using the phrase: “I’m just an intern.”

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Sure, some days it sucks being the lowest on the totem pole in a work environment, but you can get away with A LOT by using the phrase “I’m just an intern.”

When something goes wrong with a computer system, or your team forgets important equipment off site, you get to look at your supervisor and say, “Gee, I don’t really know about that, I’m just an intern.” If other people come to the office who need directions, or to find someone, you can smile politely and quickly say, “I don’t know where that room is or who they are, I’m just an intern.” When things go wrong in the office, a quick diversion for damage control is, “Sorry! I’m just an intern.”

2. Less Responsibility

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As soon as you are on payroll, there is *that* much more responsibility to know where things are, show up on time, and complete work quickly. I’m not saying you can show up late everyday during an internship and get brownie points. It is important to take the internship seriously, maybe even more so than a job, if you want to be noticed as having integrity.

You never know what an internship might lead to! The company I am with now asked me to apply for a position with them a little over a month after being on time, available, and on top of it every day I showed up. But if anything were to happen at work that I didn’t understand or know how to handle, as an intern, I would look to the people above me for leadership.

You’re not expected to know it all and get it right the first time, as an intern. Less responsibility for happenings at the office means less weight on your own shoulders.

3. You Can’t Get Fired (at least it’s pretty hard to get fired, maybe if you do something realllly awful)

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As an intern you can’t get fired. A lot of places offer internships to students for school credit, or to people with limited experience as an opportunity to get their foot in the door, in a particular field, for free. And if you are working for free, it would take a lot of no-shows and crappy work for a supervisor to let you go. At many places, the interns do the leg work and keep the office running smoothly. Interns oftentimes save companies money. So, even if you are late, need to schedule change, or have a bad week and mess everything up earning the label “Intern of the Month” you still (probably) won’t get fired.

4. Freedom

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We live in a generation where commitment is lax and even looked down upon, but when you are just entering the work force, it can be comforting to know you are not locked into a particular position, or with a certain company. During an internship, you have freedom to decide if you like the industry or not. And if you like the industry, but can’t stand your supervisor, you get to walk away with a successful internship experience 3-6 months later. This will amp up your resume, while giving you the freedom to walk away and not be locked in at the end of your scheduled internship.

5. Solidarity With Other Interns

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There is solidarity in numbers, especially if you are treated as a lowly intern. I’ve been lucky to have supervisors who have taken me seriously as an intern and worker, but that doesn’t mean the work was always fun. Oftentimes intern work can seem tedious, boring, or like “busy work.” But supervisors give interns work so that they can focus on more important things.

Working at a computer that shuts down, in a dark corner, researching such and such for three days- while everyone else in the office is running around, talking, laughing, and drinking coffee- can really carry some negative weight. Except that on those days, I would look up and see other interns in the same position and realize I’m not alone. Then, I’d continue chugging away at whatever tedious project I didn’t understand was so important to my supervisor in the moment, and smile.

One of my favorite things about being an intern at one particular place I worked was finding community with other interns. We’d go out for happy hour at cheap bars after work, laughing at the day and dreaming about the future… It was awesome to connect with others who were striving to find a place, just like me, at a big office doing seemingly pointless or boring tasks. That community and solidarity was important.

6. A Unique Experience

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Hopefully, as with anything in life, you will have fun stories and get to do creative things as an intern. Big or small, anything you can stick to for months without getting paid shows character. Especially when you know an internship is one step of learning and growing, to get to your bigger goals and dreams. Internships offered me hope and expectation for the future.

At each internship, I saw myself moving in different directions. Whether it was emailing connections in other countries in Spanish, helping design shoes, programming shows for TV stations, sitting at a computer for hours logging 100’s of video clips, running through the tunnel with the Penn State football team at a home game, coming up with ideas and emailing them to my supervisor in the middle of the night, running out of money, laughing about it all over cheap wine with other interns, and best of all my supervisor approaching me to apply for a job with them because they wanted me; I wouldn’t trade my internship ups and downs for anything.

I recommend everyone on the job hunt to intern somewhere, especially if you’re not 100% where to go next. It’s humbling, but you just never know what doors might open!

 

Philly Meets Bethlehem

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When you get one day off in a quarter, because you work three jobs and volunteer three places, you want it to mean some something and you treat that day like gold. At least I do because that’s been my life since August.

That golden day off, I took a solo adventure to Philadelphia, a city I had “been to” twice to the King of Prussia mall (not even in Philly) and once to a club in the middle of the night for New Years. When I was in college in CA, and friends told me about Love Park and seeing the Liberty Bell in my home state and I made it a goal to one day see those famous sites in Philly, not too far from my home town in PA.

It helps that my younger brother moved to Philly in recent months and that his birthday was just around the corner. It was worth my little adventure to see him for dinner and to have a place to park my car for the day.

The day before, I connected with a local Philly girl about what she recommended as the top “must see” spots for an impromptu day trip.

Alone but not lonely in my ventures, the Liberty Bell was free to visit, Love Park is pea sized compared to my original expectations, the Macy’s Christmas light show was cute, and I stumbled upon so much history!

Thomas Jefferson is buried in the city, the original White House was in Philly before being moved to D.C. Betsy Ross, who sewed the first American flags, stars forming a circle instead of lines on the flag, lived in Philly. And one of the cutest, oldest standing streets in the country, Elpheth’s Ally, was decorated a quaint colonial feel for Christmas.

History, lights, trains into the city, and navigating the sites was necessary and fun to get a quick breather and impromptu day traveling!

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Liberty Bell

I also learned how excruciatingly small the world is. You see, Love Park offers a Christmas Village with vendors from all over selling cute trinkets and off beat Christmas presents, and Danish food and drinks for purchase. At that point it was 4 PM, I hadn’t eaten since breakfast, and had driven 3 hours and walked the city. A flaky, sweet, cinnamony apple strudel was waiting for me at an older baker’s shop. Between that and a coffee, I enjoyed my snack, as I sat on dirty, city steps below the LOVE at Love Park, while a musician played Christmas carols for the bystanders.

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Love Park

 

I looked around and noticed a booth with wooden carvings and a sign that said something about Bethlehem. Having been to Bethlehem I wandered over and peeked in.

“I’ve seen these carvings before!” I told the man and woman inside. “Are you from Bethlehem? Are these from Bethlehem?”

“Yeah!” the woman responded. “They’re from his family’s shop; they ship them here. We just want to share a little bit of Bethlehem with the people here!”

I pulled out my phone and showed her a Facebook pic that I had posted of the shop I visited in Bethlehem in 2012.

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Photo in Bethlehem of carved camel from Olive Tree wood.

“Yes! We used to sell camel carvings like that!”

I turned to the man, “The man in this shop that I went to in Bethlehem, he talked about the USA and selling things here, was he your father perhaps? I mean I know there were a ton of olive tree, wood carvings shops all on one street, but what if I met your father?”

In Bethlehem when I visited in 2012, the man in the shop stood out to me because he talked to the other students and myself when we were there. He was tall and refined looking. The shop was clean and organized. And he spoke about the USA as he traveled here himself and shipped carvings.

He was also a Christian. In his shop there were carvings of Jesus on the cross as well as quaint nativity scenes to purchase, all made from Olive Tree wood in the little town of Bethlehem where Jesus was born.

Now, the man in Philly smiled, “Yeah, there are a lot of shops in Bethlehem right next to each other, but my Dad runs a store there. You probably met him!”

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*Photo I took from a shop in Bethlehem in 2012.

I explained that the camel I bought from his father was bowing almost. It had a bit of red rug on his back, like the camels on display in their booth in Philly. They laughed and said I was a Bethlehem girl. Then they helped me pick out a small ornament as a Christmas gift for my mom.

The encounter was inspiring, but I was a bit weirded out, not going to lie.

It reminds me, the world is small. There are connections all over.

What’s more is my experience in Israel was difficult on a number of levels, but I loved the camel carving I bought. And since the encounter with this Israeli couple in Philly, memories have floated back to mind about my trip years before to their homeland.

Beyond that, it is Christmas. Celebrating Christmas now with flashbacks of the place that set the scene for the first nativity scene works for me…

It’s like He planned it.